Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Too much to do.

2. Work on roughs to fill them empty space. Lavender's blue, a little nut tree, the cat that went to London.
3. Draw out A Swarm of Bees in May.
4. Take Tom to get his lift to the Scilly Isles for World Gig Championship.
Oops. Dropped Tom off then five minutes later heard a strange sound. Mobile phone ringing. "Where are my tickets for the steamship to Scilly's?" I am a bad bad mother. Boy and tickets untied and many thanks to Andy for being more on the ball than me!
5. Go to Celtic Vision in Narberth to retrieve camera from the Celtic Camera Shaman who has put camera through the wash.
6. Read, for at least 30 minutes.
7. Try and catch a giant panda.
8. Take the black dog of doubt that snarls and growls in your head out for a walk and run him ragged until you know again that you can do this, all of this, even if parts of the list roll over onto another day, that you will find images for every blank page in the nursery rhymes book, that the words will gather for the story of the lost child and the giant panda, that an idea will form in the mind's eye for the Christmas card design, for the cards, for the book cover.
9. Watch the swallows fly in and out of the barns at Glyn's.
10. Make list.
11. Get packing for print and send the bear and a couple of books to the lovely lady of song across the water.

Already distracted from my list of 'to do todays', at the end of this post I am going to put a 'done' list!

Meanwhile, walking the dogs on the airfield I tried to hold thoughts in my head but cowslips and day dreams wandered away with my good intentions.

There were footprints again, of a diaphonous creature. Perhaps it is a Silk Dragon. Perhaps the Silk Dragon sleeps during the day, feeding only on the songs of the skylarks that fill the sky today. Perhaps at night the Silk Dragon wakes and protects the slumbering larks in their nests of tall grass, from weasel and stoat, from owl and from fox, so that they rest and can sing the following day. 
Perhaps I should do some work now, but then maybe this is what books are made from, tha random daydreams of a wandering mind.

Almost ran a black dog over on the way back from St Davids. Ah, the irony! Glad I didn't.

Things that I have done today.
1. Signed vat forms and sent cheque in the post. Now maybe, just maybe, I am up to date and life can get back to normal, but it has been a long and expensive experience that I have not enjoyed.
2. Paid electricity bill.
3. Walked dogs, heard skylarks, watched swallows, heard grasshopper warblers in twilight.
4. Made discs of image Linda M Smith and put in the post and listened to Artemisia.
5. Gone to supermarket and bought stuff.
6. Washed up and made supper and fed remains of nettles to dogs.
7. Mused on dragons with footprints of silken thread soaked with early morning dew.
8. Tidied up a bit, but not much.
9. Made another list and mused on all of the things on the earlier list that are not yet crossed out.
10. Had heart lifted by the silhoette of woman riding a bear across a twilit star dotted sky above my beautiful house.


  1. Yes, you can do it.The Little Engine did. Obama did.

  2. Here's a hint that you may find helpful. I'm a list maker too and so oten, other things pop up that need my attention and at the end of the day, nothing on my list is done. So....write down all the extras that you encounter at the bottom of the list and cross them off. Then you won't feel like you haven't achieved anything. It will also help you to see if these were really things that needed to be done or if you're doing them to procrastinate.
    Send the snarling black dogs of doubt to me and I'll deal with them for you. See that's one thing off your list already!

  3. We have swallows nesting just outside our front door at the moment....I love them. Perhaps if I watch them for you, you could strike that one off your list :)

  4. Oh yes. Have often thought of doing the list at the end of the day and only including what I have done. Bloody black dogs of doubt haunt my heart sometimes.Most times. Found it easier to cope with them after reading something by Evelyn Wiliams whose drawings I love. She suffers them too and her work is just so so strong. Somehow this knowledge gave me couarge to face them and bark back.

  5. You have too much to do but this sure is a whimsical list to read. I love #1 and that it is crossed off.

  6. now here is a question, have the footprints only appeared since you received your (silk) dragon from Australia? You may have to keep an eye on that naughty young creature.

  7. Lists are wonderful things. I write them every day and enjoy crossing items off. I agree with Emerald Window, as we all do more in our day than we realise. Sometimes circumstances make us stray from our intended path and then we have to come back on track and move forward again. You achieve so much, so don't be hard on yourself.

  8. Dogs of doubt or not, you are held in high esteem in my eyes. I wish I had even a tiny bit of the magic your mind contains :)

    Well, perhaps I have found a tiny bit..but still not much compared to you! :) hehe
    *Sending you good vibes & a magical time machine to make sure everything gets done* xxx

  9. Yes I agree with Emerald Window; it can bring a bit of satisfaction at the end of the day if you slide on a few things you did, then go back a few minutes later and cross them off.

    Glory, glory, I did find a cheap flight from Canada to London at the end of May and so will have a chance to get to the V&A to see the Quilt Exhibit! I am looking forward to my own reaction to the Rajah quilt....and to the others.....such a wonderful variety of women's histories there.

  10. Lists, lists, lists! I am JUST finished today with writing a grant..... still one more task - to take the grant to the post for overnight mail. I had so many little sticky notes everywhere, lists stuck on other lists, upon others. It is a grand day when one crosses off the list! I will celebrate this weekend, good timing with Beltane upon us.... but, then the lists start again!! I'm going to try the list at the end of the day for a while.. and I like Emerald Window's idea of the writing encounters down. I wonder as well, why those black dogs of doubt seem to plague we artists so much? Do you think its because to keep our work growing we are in constant self-evaluation.. are you? I am.....
    Blessings of creative confidence to you... such gifts you bring to the world. Thanks for being an inspiration and a wonderful enchanter. And thanks for helping those cats with their blog... I love their encounters!
    just waking up to make my lists in the US

  11. I too carry lists around that are ever growing, as I cross off some items and add more. Have you had any luck in catching a panda?

  12. Hmmm, glad and also sad to know that the black dogs affect even artists of your calibre...glad because I realise I'm not the only one who doubts my abilities and wonders why I'm doing this when it's such a struggle sometimes, sad because I think 'gosh, well if Jackie still gets hope there'll ever be a time when I'M comfortable with what I do and how I do it!' But perhaps that's just the way it should be, if we ever get completely comfortable with our art, maybe that's the time to stop doing it?

    I'm not very good with keeping lists, so I'm possibly the most disorganised woman on the planet!

  13. I had a giant stuffed panda bear as a child. It had come down through the ranks of siblings, so it was filthy and missing an eye, but I loved him so much and cried and cried when time and our dog turned him into a pile of fur and stuffing.
    After 50 years, he's still my best friend.